I arrived on Thursday to a Red carpet welcome
and it was a pity I had to arrive like this:
All because finally after 30 years in Northern Ireland I became an Orange woman!
Now you have all watched, listened and read while I complained about the endless dreary grey days over the past several months. Alas I spent most of it indoors. Indoors makes for pale people and ‘pale’ is certainly not my colour. My pride took over and after a lengthy debate – five minutes – drastic measures were needed.
An appointment was quickly made at my local beauty salon. It had worked for Elly & George’s wedding back last June, everyone said how well I looked, so why not just repeat the performance once more!
I first had the now grey eyebrows and eyelashes dyed to add definition and then when all was dry I went to the spray paint shop! Now my instructions were as before: I wanted a healthy glow and not to look like I was marinated in carrot and orange juice for a month! She must have misheard the instruction, the difficulty was that the colour became stronger as it settled in. By morning Mr Robert Kilroy Silk was anaemic compared to me!
Having arranged to meet Elly by lunchtime I decided to set out and she would come up with a solution for me. Little did I realise how punny that would turn out to be!
The eyelashes were the correct colour but alas the eyebrows looked as they were painted with an inch wide brush and the colour was completely wrong for me. If I was no picture, then Elly’s face sure made up for it! “OMG! What happened to you mum?” replaced the usual excited welcome and hug.
While I sipped coffee frantic calls were made to Elly’s good friend Ena at Isis Beauty Salon, and appointments were juggled about to accommodate me. Ena set to work and sorted the eyebrows. It was at this point we reached item No 3 from yesterdays list.
You remember the ‘dipped, stripped and went a step further than Cleopatra!’ It is what you have waited a full day for. Using alcohol soaked pads she gently started to rub my face. “Yes its working”, squealed Elly, and I am not sure if it was encouragement for Ena or to appease me. Since I was lying down with my eyes closed I had no idea if I was now striped like a Zebra or spotted like a Leopard!
“VODKA!” said Ena. “Buy some on the way home and use it to bleach the skin”
Cleopatra bathed in Asses’ milk, so Grannymar would bathe in Vodka! 😀
I did and you all saw the result on Saturday! “This will make great posting material” I said to Elly. “Yes mum it will, but save it until next week or everyone will be walking up to you all night and giving you funny looks!” A couple of hours and I was ready for anything.
George arrived home with his work colleague Keith, our guest for dinner. Since he was going to the Irish Blog Awards and the Photo Walk organised by Red Mum with Elly early in the day it was natural for him to stay. We had great fun and we laughed about my disaster as we all prepared dinner. When you visit Elly it is all hands on deck and everyone plays a part in preparing the food. Wine was poured and the stories were told. It was a lovely beginning to a great weekend. So you see I was not kidding about having a Toyboy for dinner. 😆
Once I entered the Alexander Hotel the Toyboys were surrounding me and falling to their knees.
Late in the evening I shared a couch with Twenty Major while being interviewed by Conn Ó Muíneacháin! Sworn to secrecy so there will be no pictures of Twenty! We finished with the story of the young gentleman who earlier shook my hand and told me I made his night, (now you don’t expect me to name him here, do you?). I told Conn that it was many a long year since I made any man’s night! With that the tape ran out and it was time for Cinderella to leave the Ball.
We had fun, we had laughter and met amazingly talented people, it was an honour to be there and the memories will linger for many a long year! Without you, my friends who read my blog and add the comments, none of this would happen.