A young farm lad from North Kerry went to study at University in Dublin, but about one month into the first term, he had foolishly squandered away all of the allowance his parents gave him.
Then he had an idea. He called his daddy. “Dad,” he said, “you won’t believe the wonders that modern education is coming up with! Why, they actually have a course here at college that will teach our dog Blackie how to talk!”
“That’s absolutely amazing,” his father says. “Do you think I might get him enrolled on the course?”
“Just send him up here to me with €1,000” the boy says. “I’ll get him into the course. So, his father sends the dog and the €1,000.
About 6 weeks later, the money ran out again. The boy called his father again.
“So how’s Blackie doing, son,” his father asks.
“Awesome, Dad, he’s talking up a storm,” he says, “but you just won’t believe this – they’ve had such good results with this course that they’ve started a new one to teach the animals how to READ!”
“READ,” says his father, “No kidding! What do I have to do to get him in that course?”
Just send €2,500, I’ll get him in the class. His father sends the money.
The boy now has a problem. The Christmas holiday was approaching, his father would find out that the dog could neither talk, nor read. So he shoots the dog. When he gets home for the holiday, his father is all excited.
“Where’s Blackie? I just can’t wait to see him talk and read something!”
“Dad,” the boy says, “I have some bad news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Blackie was in the living room reading the Irish Times, like he usually does. Then he turned to me and asked, ‘is your daddy still messing’ around with that little redhead who lives in Tralee?’
The father says, “I hope you SHOT that F*ck*r before he talks to your Mother!”
“I sure did, Dad!”
“That’s my boy!”
I am sure that young lad will go far!